Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Love at the Office: Dating Someone at Work

Should you date someone at the office? The long and short answer is--no. If you are both unrelentingly drawn to each other however, then you may have to consider another job in order to date because an office romance can have certain consequences for your career that you had not planned on.

We often do not think these things through when we meet someone we are attracted to. But an office romance can be a challenge. If you proceed to mix your love life with your work life, you can put yourself under significant stress.

Here are some choices to consider if you have a relationship so compelling, you cannot stay away from each other:

* Consider all of the consequences of dating this person before you date them.

If this person is so irresistible you cannot stay away from him or her, are you ready to give up your job for them if that is what is required?

If you date and then break up, how comfortable are you going to feel in the same workplace?

Are you or the person you want to date emotionally volatile? What would happen if you had a fight at work?

Is this person discreet and trustworthy? If you tell them your secrets, will they tell other people at work?

What are the policies where you work about dating someone you work with? Read those carefully before you proceed.

* Keep your dating life under the radar.

Before you decide that you want to "go public" with your relationship, keep your dates quiet and to yourselves. You will know within a reasonable amount of time if this romance has a chance of growing into something lasting.

* Consider removing yourself from the same work place as the person you are dating.
Look into getting promoted, transferred, or finding another job, depending on what your company policies are. Get a mentor or a coach to help you strategize what your choices are and to help you implement a plan.

Are you ready for an office romance? It's complicated, it's challenging, and it's risky. If you have your life relatively in order; if you are known to make good decisions; and if you cannot deny that "something" is there between you, proceed with caution. If it's love, it's worth it.
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1 comment:

Cameron Sharpe said...

Online dating and socializing is a fun way to meet people. I have met alot of great people thru chats, IM, e-mail. You can talk to anyone from your own back yard to the other side of the world. Granted it can be dangerous if you do not follow the rules, but so is conventional dating. I wont meet someone within the first week of chatting. And never meet anyone alone...always bring a friend and meet in a public place. Stick to those little rules and you should stay safe. There are more pros to online dating and socializing than there are cons. It is so much fun. You should try it.